Well word can really give you a great perspective in what we do  and majorly in what we say to others. The explanation of the word’s meaning makes it quite ever clear vice versa.

Here it goes:

noun: ultimatum; plural noun: ultimata; plural noun: ultimatums
  • a final demand or statement of terms, the rejection of which will result in retaliation or a breakdown in relations.
    “their employers issued an ultimatum demanding an immediate return to work”

    synonyms;  final offer, final demand, take-it-or-leave-it deal; threat

    “he gave me an ultimatum, basically I pay him by Thursday or he calls the cops”

    Even the meaning in the synonyms was interesting i must say. I really have come to the point where i do need my time alone and its really getting real thin with giving up on dreams and sometimes even God too. But I just can’t give up God at all. I will have to do a sit down with my bosses and manager for a matter of having my month off without pay but still keeping the contact intact. Base line stays and most people would say no way. What i am about to do next will be a right move in the needed rest and recovery. one person in the company has been playing to many games and really fore see that the change will not come. As I have said in my previous postings – self create strive does not make any sense at all when you already a have to baby the clients.


    In end January 2016, I will be setting my lines for myself due to burn out. Right now still running fumes. Which is to re tape the contact from 12 to a 11 months working time frame at this point of have at least a month off in each year.If there is travel by the company I on that month that i am resting on. I will not go even if it is for community projects weather christian or not I really don’t want to care. Working back to back makes it damn dumb till the point of no rest. Physically and mentally. I realized i am a true workaholic. Which has change the perspective of my own personal life even getting married seem like a chore now. Which I don’t even have time for people and even myself. ball is in my court and I am using it before I go mental. O well lets just see what the results will be! This actually is not a threat more of a line drawn for mental health reasons like no able to sleep, burnout as physical work become worst daily, flat foot problems my ankles have give way anyways both of them! hmmmm…………….


Devotion @ and in work and life.

This is really quite interesting. Work life balance has been a problem as a a first world country. Everything is moving so fast that it has no meaning and no value anymore. Everybody wants to have the information right at the their fingertips. Not even that, internally the back at office fighting political wars which don’t even makes sense. Which to me makes more invaluable situation look stupid to a point of no return in person life one bit. I can and would understand if God was refining his vessels. Blind fire from the devil is really useless to make you more tired which amounts to blind firing that takes a whole lot of energy fighting a fire which you know you may not win at all. At the cost of time and energy.

Effect of change was never about us but always about God, Jesus and the Holy Spirit. Culture is something we will never be able to control, with that said only God’s love should be a culture not force fed into its people create by man as a culture. Keeping a torn around does not help the matter the you still got problematic customers to serve. Strive = Selfishness (I can’t say that loud enough) create by that one person can kills the team for it has no value to the outcome. For the heart is evil.

Day 1 Devo.

I was reading on Bible.com devotinal The lie of Busyness – something interesting. – Pslam 39:6 – We are merely moving shadows, and all our busy rushing ends in nothing. We heap up wealth, not know who will spend it.

My quote of today is “Busyness by itself isn’t wrong, but busyness requires intention. (point to take with intention – an acquired need not want) Pray that God will guard you from ‘pointless busyness‘ and that if you are busy, that you’ll live busy with a purpose.’

I have come to a point where showing face is not a case for work but just to show that man is there when there is no use for it. Showing face has literally no function useless there for a purpose. Breaking out of the old ways cycle of work culture in Singapore is one of them. Picking up selfishness, complacency and ignorance does not help as it does cause stress levels to go up and drives no function whatsoever. I promise myself to see these things through if I really ever become a boss is to have that culture of christ truly centered as a whole life aspect not to hard burn enforced onto people but to teach in love and trust which works.

The down time!

Favorite things to do when having down times. Sometimes its the just the best time to sleep and let your body recover from the work weeks beating. Playing some racing games and watching some dramas just to have some sort of rest. I do confess I haven’t been reading the bible as much.And I do miss spending time with God. Need some materials to keep me some what home bound instead of having ants in my pants. I will be starting some small simple bible studies by going back to my bibles school books and reading through them again. Which will be quite interesting.

Understanding the plight!

Will I do see the things God is doing in my life. I also want that breakthrought in the the spiritual aspect too. Which I do sometimes see in the next few months I will be trying to write reviews of books and and sermons. Will have to try simple blogging methods too also help me in my written english and not to sound so hush. I just got a K480 bluetooth keyboard for the time being. As I might be buying a Microsoft Surface 2 in time to come to replace my old laptop.

Seems like cleaning up my old laptop or factory reset was harder to undersatnd more then ever. Right now I am contented with this setup which would serve it purpose. Things at work have been looking a little grim. As people still only think of their own wit and mind which makes me feel really out of place to understanding the practice of christianity. The pass few months workload has started to pile to the sky in which i have been work to the core of last minute projects that should not be there at all. Not only that autopilot from the from the consulting department has started the blame game.

The only thing I could understand was not to fight or numb the stress factor of work. But to understand which perspective I stand at. A consultant, colleage & counselor who is working with me to put in to action relationship breakthroughs with that someone I am working with that is causing strive with unwanted needles in works also. Acceptance and forgiveness is still something I still can’t wrap my head around. Expressing the things we need to express would be one he said, to help people understand me too. I just find that my life never evole around work but real hardwork that show that the action is really valueable and the heart of the action put in. (Thats my understadning) Keeping quiet like what the bible says really works to some extent. Which I do see things changing around me more often then ever. Fools like me who comes from more entertainment backgroud would be like a crazy gossip and influencer to the company around us. Words without value. Now I do find words are cheap. Words without action never helps the situation. Give me or us a solution with function not selfishness!

Here is the formula:
Words + Action + Heart = Real satisfaction!
Words + no action = lifelessness.
Words + no heart = lifelessness.

Here it goes.

This a function of life it all start with a lie, double standards preached, falsehood & selfishness. Everytime I face this sort of thing I will come with a equation or a simple metafore of dominos made to fall in to that position.  If that only one thing to learn from it, its just that it usually end with something not good. It goes something like this:

This is a concept self created stupidity – Lies/Double tongue = STRIVE + sickness + pain + Worthless struggle = Death without a cause!

Then i will try and counter it with either logic or God’s word!.

The 5C’s concept. / Read Proverbs 12. Read the whole chapter please. Its really valuable.

This is where line are drawn. Its driving people to sickness more then ever. I am always ready for a fight. Even if I am sick. My body may be sick but soul and the Holy spirit & Jesus will reign vengeance for me even if I fall. Amen!

That path, road or walk.

It just gets harder every time. He does lookout for you. He does give Grace. Ho does give Love. He give the helping hand when needed. I still didn’t understand it till now that it would be this hard to walk the hardest off road to understand what God wants from me. Every time people take avantage of me I still fight back for what is right. I question myself this ‘did I do it correctly?’. Thus so the to bosses they know and they understands. But with knowledge does not really come with applied knowledge in life and in God. As we say the paper pushes to the people who hold themselves in high regard all the best for you. cause the applied knowledge with understanding has more need to for understanding.

Here is the system. With knowledge – its just information – With applied force of knowledge comes understanding – With applied knowledge without understanding that knowledge – its just pure stupidity – thinking that everything would work out your way. So assume that you have work it out. Jackasses…………………..

The people with mind games

Work is never done because somebody is always chattering away and it does disturb everybody else. Which is a major counter productive function of finish your day to day work. Like bullshit talk. Like bi%$#@# in the office, the gossip does everything to cheer the unless worker to push work to other. Thats just majorly stupid (as they say they are christians cultured office)- freaking bullshit. I still thank God for those who are pure at heart doing their work without complicency. After all the accusations that came to me I went back to my old habits smoking and drinking and womanizing to numb my mind. Which is really not helping, its just making me more tired and a dry pocket. All I could now is draw the lines and have my small peace away from that one person who is playing that game. God looks like I am back at square one with this Bitch………. Which self created strife in a team does not help anybody. Saying one thing and doing another makes you look really stupid. Sad to say this person does not see it but we all do. Waste off time and energy. Just say you want power we will understanding in where we can place you. But with that selfishness you will get nothing. Don’t you see God is there and you will not win this war because I too will not let you have a piece of me. Acting Holy gets yourself killed dumbass. I do admit I am headstrong for a very valid reason.

Sorry I got to stop and have a smoke. This bullshit has to stop. Not everything is about you.

Caught between spiritual living and physical mindsets.

My heart and mind is looking at the situation like woah. Past year through the strive of having better profit margins and crazy work where people almost had to scream at each other due to their selfishness or for whatever reason. We all as a company were trying to balance the bar between relationships in the office and with God. The best point even when the bosses are preaching the same nominal role of pushing us to respect our leaders. thinking that we don’t but actually we do. As all of us are trying hard just that we don’t have much time to talk. ( Its not I don’t respect you! I don’t respect the situation that we are in!) – Don’t hate the player but hate the game. in that metaphor – you can control situations and outcomes. I was still asking this question is anybody bigger than God? Bosses to leaders and small leadership roles. Demanding respect was something I only understood in and in due situations but having to give is another.

Things that God has revealed to me was alot of things that alot of humans that can cut pass face value and having full value for pure word promise to actions and understanding what God’s principles are for HIS people. Not for the human leadership. Yes! we have leaders to leaders and bosses to boss us around but nobody is bigger than God for sure. Try demanding respect from God when you still have sin n your life! I think we all know what this outcome is. Zapp!

I had had to give to one of my superiors who explained the situation as leaders not all leaders are perfect. Yes I understood that long way back. But still, transparency is needed in God’s house. Which I know that makes a family unit and bond so strong by the grace of God’s we all know where we stand as a company in a circular world and marketplace. Yes actions do count. But demanding respect nah. I stop action acting when I went to bible school with an understand the relationships are important more then the work and the expense of the people to energy usage. True action by heart is always by God not force but perfectly by God thats my belief. Of course also practicing giving.

I am caught in between having to stay or go. If and ever this situation comes. I am caught so bad due to a physical, mental and emotional burnout that I can’t seem to move as fast as I usually can. Even in the last few weeks. After a company so called retreat and management meeting. We all had face the 20% blessing and through this strive then I saw the love and grace of God. Which was so true, without pain we would never learn. not striving with our minds and heart and our own will. During the trip it had shown alot of changes after strife. God love just when wrapping around people like me and other who needed the rest which was kinda cool!

Alright i will have to stop here. If you do read this please do comment and give me some insight about what you think can be done in a christian culture in the market like the office culture and market. Tell me about what you think too I am open to option to understanding people too. Learning is something I never had.

Thanks for dropping by!

Your Grace, Wisdom & Strength

This would be one of the hardest to write or even type out due to our sinful nature. As humans we sometimes have only one perspective and which i Thank God for HIS wisdom and revelation revealed to men. As for this plot of text that I am getting ready to share will be hardest for me working in the christian culture. Sometimes sad,fake & happy.

Col 3:23 NKJV
And whatever you do, do it heartily, as to the Lord and not unto men.

When I entered this office it was all happy and cherry. Which I thought was really vague and fake. I learnt in Bible school that action counts alot to how we apply in proper action. Balancing the action and word to promises of God and working in faith and faithfully giving. In which turn from kindness being taken for granted. I really didn’t want to go back to that situation of fighting fire with fire and becoming that unforgiven person. But I had too. To show certain people in the office that not every was for them. It really yielded to my anger and my old self jadedness came back.

Worst of all you can see things happening in the office which I could not comprehend. Saying that your a christian and giving the other side of the butt. God which part of firmness do I apply. And meekness towards people older then me? Shit no! Unnecessary energy and time wasted in talking which means nothing! Help i am ready to quit and move without work and money in the pocket. Rather be poor and have a sound-mind and heart.

God what is going on?

The train ride.

This really got me thinking about how my mind map might look. Some people say that the mind is so complicated like that of many pipelines connected with out points of nerves that work the muscle to push and pull. And reacting to every emotion. Just thought how my mind would look on paper might be colourful, messy or dull. What would really happen if I really wrote what I was thinking and drawing everything to link and reason bubbles or box. Box for title and bubbles for reasons.

I really think blogging won’t be enough. Settling and unsettling point of the true me would have been a sort after effect of how can this be…..!? Is this me?! All the wonder for what God has given us as human beings. Comes to think of it. That paper would have to way bigger then the bill board. Like a mad science guy. Formulas and puzzules. Oh great I shall stop. Arriving to meet my old time friend for coffe and smokes. Holland village.

We have to proclaim!

Just a small quote in proclaiming what God can do for us as sons and daughters in Christ. Thinking & speaking and proclaiming God’s gifts and staying in that light. Something small I picked up while listening to Bill Johnson sermon. In the beginning of the sermon that turn into prayer in proclaiming God’s promises and gifts. Prosperity in living with a purpose in spreading the word of God to sowing seeds in giving to others when we have enough in and from God.

Just simple stuff or pointers I picked up when I was listening to it.

Proclaiming the 5 Streams of income:

1. Interest in income / growing interest in income. (I hope that is a right pointer)
2. Rebate returns.
3. Cheque’s in the mail. (Bonuses from God)
4. Gift surprises.
5. Finding money. (It really just might drop out of the sky)

As we (christians) are working and getting blessed by the Lord we should also bless others too. And feed the poor too. As we practice giving time and love and money to fund other peoples lifes I pray that God will give you wisdom in managing finances and other short comings we have.